Phenylketonuria


Don’t scroll down to look for a picture of a smashed can in this blog posting because it isn’t there. I didn’t smash this can because I didn’t open it and everyone knows that difficult it is to smash a sealed can. The reason that I did not open it for easy access to its contents is that my interest in its contents was not sufficient because I am a Phenylketonuric. I took this picture of this can so that I could point out to you that my name has been written on it. See, right there above the website address: Phenylketonuric which had may as well be my name because there are only fifty or so of us in the state and fifty of anything is fewer people than the number of people who are named Joshua and who live in this state. So now I am likely to have people calling me by this name. Oh well, can’t say I didn’t ask for it (but I didn’t say please).

I took this picture while lying down on the Seaside Church parking lot and pointing the camera to the west directly after the second service.

Oh, you probably want to know what a phenylketonuric is. A pheylketonuric is a person who is allergic to Phenylalanine. Phenylalanine is an amino acid. Amino acids are the building of protein. Since I am such phenylketonuric, I avoid all protein except that which has been processed so that the said amino acid has been removed. This often appears odd to people who are ignorant of the reasoning behind it. Fortunately, I have nearly always had a dear sister in the same condition to help me out.

My dear sister has told me that one of the good parts (I don’t think that she said best) parts of her honeymoon was not having to pack any food or even think about what she was going to eat because her new husband knew exactly what she would want to eat. This brings me to the the most valuable part of this posting: instructions for people whose VIPs have complicated diets:

  1. Find out what the name of the condition is and then research it yourself. It will show that you have been paying attention to the lady and that you really can’t think of anything better to think about than what is good for the person to whom the name of that condition applies.
  2. Don’t say “Poor you, I could never live like that!”
  3. Don’t ask the same questions about it over and over again.
  4. Don’t say how sorry you are to not have any food appropriate for your VIP and then forget the next time and talk on and on about how sorry you are yet again.
  5. Don’t make a point of mentioning it to all of your friends when you are telling them about your new VIP. This will only force them to answer the same questions over and over again while listening to the same insensitive comments.
  6. Don’t be like a relative of mine and say “that vegetarian pizza looks like dog food.”

Can I hear an “Amen” sister?

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2 Responses to “Phenylketonuria”

  1. Patso8 Says:

    Your list seems a bit self-serving but nonetheless I will continue to call you Joshua if for no other reason than my inability to say pheylketonuria, I doubt I could even type it.

  2. Odell Elter Says:

    The body changes phenylalanine into tyrosine, another amino acid that’s needed to make proteins, brain chemicals, including L-dopa, epinephrine, and norepinephrine, and thyroid hormones. Because norepinephrine affects mood, different forms of phenylalanine have been proposed to treat depression. Symptoms of phenylalanine deficiency include confusion, lack of energy, depression, decreased alertness, memory problems, and lack of appetite.,

    Remember to read our very own blog site
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